When the World Feels Like a Scary Place: Essential Conversations for Anxious Parents and Worried Kids by Abigail Gewirtz

Author:Abigail Gewirtz [Gewirtz, Abigail]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Workman Publishing Company
Published: 2020-05-12T04:00:00+00:00

Go ahead, kill yourself

#suicide #bullying #highschool #internet

School shootings have, unfortunately, captured a great deal of attention. But, of course, there are other forms of violence that exploit the peer group. And as children age, violence can become more sophisticated and insidious. Bullying, in particular, not only finds fertile ground in a school or group setting, but also via online, text, and other electronic communication.

Lilian, a ninth grader, is acclimating to high school. She lives alone with her dad. She is on the cheerleading team, and at a football game meets her first boyfriend, Nate. Lilian’s dad wants to meet Nate, but Nate is reluctant. Lilian and Nate can often be found hanging out in the park with Nate’s friends. One day, the friends are poring over one of Nate’s texts when Lilian shows up. She leans in and sees a picture of a boy being attacked, with the following message, “U R next.” Lilian asks what’s up, but Nate’s friends say none of her business. The next day at the park, she again watches Nate and his friends texting and laughing. This time she sees the following:

“Ur a worm

get back in the soil

die worm!!!!!”

Later that week, she sees one more message:

“use the knife

ur life isn’t worth living”

Lilian asks Nate directly what is going on. Nate explains that he and his friends are in a fight with “a really mean kid,” Jacob, “who got my friend Gavin in trouble at school.” The boys are “messing with” Jacob to “try to get to him.” What’s so mean about Jacob? Lilian asks. Nate says he filed an anti-bullying report against Gavin. “So he’s getting what he deserves.”

Lilian is disturbed by what she has seen and heard. She’s seeing a side of Nate she’s never seen before and doesn’t like. She’s also scared for this boy she’s never met, Jacob. And she’s worried that Nate will get into trouble for what he and his friends are doing to Jacob. But Lilian doesn’t know what to do. Her dad is already suspicious of Nate because Nate won’t come to meet him, so she’s reluctant to tell her dad. She doesn’t feel that she can confide in her girlfriends, either, because she is worried about getting Nate into trouble and because she just doesn’t feel that close to them.

At home, Dad notices that Lilian seems upset, remote, and worried. When he asks about her day at school, she rebuffs him. One evening at dinner, he decides to be more forthright.

Red Light

Dad: Lilian, what’s wrong?

Lilian: Nothing, Dad.

Dad: Don’t say “nothing.” I can see that something is wrong. You have barely said a word all week. Did something happen with that boyfriend of yours?

Lilian (starts crying): Dad, leave me alone!

Lilian storms out, goes to her room, and slams the door.

Dad is flummoxed. He tried to be sympathetic but all he got was a storm of tears, and he doesn’t know what to do next. He thinks through his conversation with Lilian and decides to apologize for the confrontation.

Download

Copyright Disclaimer:
This site does not store any files on its server. We only index and link to content provided by other sites. Please contact the content providers to delete copyright contents if any and email us, we'll remove relevant links or contents immediately.